


Soft Kisses of Ladybugs

by Kiwalla_Dragons



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, Apocalypse, Character death??, Loneliness, man i just cant get over chat blanc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:49:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21603262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiwalla_Dragons/pseuds/Kiwalla_Dragons
Summary: This shows the in between time of when Adrien was first akumatized to after Ladybug fixes everything.Hope y'all enjoy!!
Comments: 1
Kudos: 31





	Soft Kisses of Ladybugs

**Author's Note:**

> Dang, sorry y'all. I went all out with this one. It's waaay longer than I thought but it's still worth the read, I promise!!

Chat Noir felt the air knocked out of his chest when he hit the Eiffel Tower. The miraculous helps to make him stronger, so the physical pain wasn't as bad as the pain in his heart from finding out that his father was the man they were after all this time. He couldn't concentrate, unable to lift himself from the pavement, and couldn't meet the gaze of his villainous father walking up to him.  
''We can save your mother,'' Hawkmoth began. Chat felt a weakness in his legs, so he used his arms to try and put some distance between him and his father. Hawkmoth came closer, ''using your miraculous and hers.'' Chat felt all of the anxiety and despair build up, flashes of this exact scenario playing in his head. Times when his father's anger boiled over because Adrien's photo-shoots weren't up to his standard. Times when Adrien pestered his father a little too much about one thing or another. Times where Adrien felt the little strands of hope he held onto loosen in his grasp after coming home to a bad day.  
''N-No... just stop..!'' His thoughts were beginning to race in his head. He wanted this all to be over. He didn't want his father to take advantage of people's pain. He just wanted a family. He just wanted happiness and love.  
Ladybug swooped in and landed besides Hawkmoth, ''Don't listen to him! You know there would be a terrible price to pay in exchange!'' The unease Chat felt faltered, but only for a moment. He looked up at his father to see him glaring at her. The only thing going through his mind now was the realization of how close she was standing to him and how easy it would be for Hawkmoth to beat the love of his life with his cane.  
''If she really loved you she would let you save your mother.'' The pit in his stomach continued to sink, weighed down by the words of his father. He couldn't think. He couldn't breathe. He felt like he was on the verge of a panic attack. His eyes darted between the ones he loved most, both with strong opposing forces. He felt like his whole world was gonna collapse.  
''s-stop it. Stop it. STOP IT!'' He had finally reached his breaking point. He was damn-near over the edge at this point. He heard his father chuckle and the flapping of wings. Then he felt the cold feeling of dark power start to course through his veins.  
''Chat Blanc,'' his father's voice rang in his ears, ''I'm giving you the infinite power of destruction!'' Chat was trying his best to fight the evil. Fight the control that his father constantly had over him. He struggled while choking back tears as his father continued.  
''Together you and I will seize Ladybug's miraculous _and awaken your mother!!_ '' Chat continued to resist. He couldn't let his lady down. He couldn't let Paris down. But the idea of being able to reunite with his mother was... desirable.  
'' _O B E Y._ '' This word echoed in Chat's mind. His head was pounding and spinning at the same time. The thoughts of protecting Paris were slowly being placed under the thoughts of reuniting with his mother. Oh how he missed his mother's gentle and loving touch, her sweet words, her tender hugs and kisses. Maybe giving into his father's demands weren't gonna be so bad after all.  
With one final shout of anguish, Chat felt all of his muscles relax and his arms widen. He had given up control- once and for all.  
''I'm sorry, Ladybug.''  
Chat Noir felt the sickening ooze of the akuma's power take over him. The only thing getting him through this was that it was all gonna be over soon.  
He heard a muffled 'seize her miraculous, my son.' as the forces of the akuma took full affect.  
He opened his eyes, only to realize that his hand was already up and charged with a cataclysm. His heart sank when he realized who it was aimed at. he slowly began to regret his selfish decision, trying once again to go against his father's wishes.  
''No Adrien! You have to resist!'' Ladybug's words gave him a boost of power, allowing him to move his arm from LB to his very own father.  
''How _DARE YOU_!! Not me, Adrien.'' His father's words hit Chat like a brick. He continued to struggle with the orders of his mind and the orders of his heart. Why did he have to give in so easily? He aimed back at Lady bug. Why did he have to have hope that he could see his mother again? He aimed back at his father. Why can't he just let that go? She's gone. Forever. Maybe he should follow suit.  
He raised his arm towards the sky with a yelp.  
''I... I don't know what to do!'' He shut his eyes tight as he brought his own powers against his body. His stomach dropped as he continued to yell in despair. He was trying so hard to hold back his feelings, his wrongdoings, but it was far too late. He heard the shocked expressions of his loved ones grow lower and lower as they backed away from the growing energy of destruction. Maybe that's all Adrien deserved? Look at what happened when he tried a shot at happiness- at true love. Everything started to go downhill the moment he started to believe in himself. He became too selfish. Selfish, like his father. This is what he deserves. Even though his mind was spiraling, he could only think of one person.  
''M'lady...'' he wailed, desperately. He felt a strange feeling in his chest, something in between sorrow and peace.  
''My Prince...'' her hopeless plea was the last thing he heard before crying out with all of his might. The fact that he had failed the love of his life had pushed him over the edge.  
The cataclysm grew larger and larger, engulfing the entirety of Paris in his mistake. The energy of his despair grew so large that a beam of light flew towards the heavens, destroying the moon in the process. No one could be happy now, not after what he had just done. All of Paris was gone; all of the joy and laughter and love. All gone because of his selfishness.  
\--  
There was a deafening, white noise in his ears as he opened his eyes. All of the air left him as he saw what he had done. Ladybug and Hawkmoth- no, Marinette and his father were dead. Their bodies made of dust, so easily destroyed by a breath. He stood up and walked towards them, feet feeling like led and hands shaking. His mind couldn't fathom being the cause of this, but he had to come to terms with his actions. He has to face the consequences of his mistakes.  
Tears began to pool in his eyes as he heard the distant sound of rushing water. He turned and saw a massive wave coming towards him. He leaped into the air and onto the Eiffel tower as water raced through the streets he once roamed. After it had settled, he searched for the remains of his loved ones. Surprisingly, they were still in tact, standing with faces mid scream. He swam back up to the surface, seeing the floating cars and crumbling buildings around him. His body was numb and his mind was blank. He sat atop one of the floating cars and stared at the flowing blue beneath him.  
He let the water trickle through his fingers as he took a breath. The world around him was still. It was, in a twisted way, calming. Now there was no one else to get akumatized, no on else to feel hate, no one else to feel pain. But that also mean that there was no one else to feel happiness, no one else to feel warm, no one else to feel love. One cannot leave without the other, so it only makes sense for Chat to be the last man standing. Maybe he was doomed from the start, seeing as he was a black cat gifted with the power of destruction. How could he ever see a happy ending with those sorts of traits piled against him? He was too optimistic. He was too naive. He held some water in his hands and used it to splash his face. This was a wake up call. He has to clear his head of the things that he knows deep down that he never deserved.  
There was a new feeling in his gut, hunger. He looked around and jumped onto the roof tops. He'll get rid of all of his feelings after getting a bite to eat, and he new just the spot to get it.  
He jumped and zipped from roof to roof, making his way towards a bakery that he's grown to call home. He couldn't enter through the front door, so he jumped onto the balcony, opening the door to Marinette's room. He took slow, steady steps in the silent and somber room. He looked around at the stuff that Marinette used to own, her work desk, her posters, her bed. He walked over to a board that had pictures of the two of them pinned onto it. He ran uneasy fingers over the good memories captured in time. Their warm smiles and Marinette's face, free from the pain he had caused her. He exhaled and smiled sadly before turning around and descending the steps towards the bakery. Surely they'll have sweets and breads lying around the place. He ended up in the empty living room, slowly becoming unsettled by how quiet everything was. He ran his fingers over the cold couch and made his way towards the door, opening it and descending steps once again. He made it to the bakery and took in the sight before him. The room looked as if it were any regular day, but Marinette's parents were frozen in place, her mother leaning on the counter looking up at her husband and him with his arms outstretched, as if in the middle of tossing dough in the air. He stepped into the room, now covered in a blue hue from the water, and walked around the counter. He saw the dough slowly slipping off of the counter and onto the floor. His chest pained at the sight of two lives being ended so abruptly.  
He shook his head, eat now, sad later. He shifted around the bakery, finding buns and morsels. He checked the oven and found freshly baked biscuits, surely made with love. That was the Dupain-Cheng specialty. Love. It was always flourishing in this household. A true place where someone can call it a home. He grabbed one of the biscuits and bit into it. He felt so warm, letting out an expression of satisfaction. He stuffed it all in his mouth and grabbed two more, pulling up a chair while making his way towards the window. He began to eat another biscuit while watching the slow moving water carry debris.  
He felt calm, yet regret. He was the only one who was able to witness this, but he made it that way. He felt sorrow fill his body, so he took another bite to feel warm again. It was all he could do.  
\--  
Its been a couple of days since the incident. The instability he's felt is slowly starting to subside. He's making the steps towards coming to terms with the consequences of his actions. The only thing getting to him now was the overwhelming silence and loneliness. He missed the sound of his friend's voices, the feeling of Marinette's warm embraces, even began to miss the feeling of his father's gaze and their short conversations.  
Then, it hit him. He had a phone back at home. He immediately stood up and bolted towards his house. Jumping and running until he felt like he was about to double over and die. He busted through his window, the sound of the glass breaking piercing through the silence. He dusted off some of the dust from his shoulders and made his way towards his desk. This was one of the times he was glad his father was as paranoid as he was, since the back-up generator still had some juice in it. He stepped up to his computer and froze. He saw his reflection- the whiteness of his outfit and the bright blue of his eyes stared back at him. He felt disgusted, reaching over and quickly turning on the monitor. His saddened face was replaced by his mother's caring one. He felt a little better as he stared at her face. He didn't want to admit how many hours he sat and done this before the incident, and how many hours he'll do this after this point. He looked over and saw that his phone was also on his desk. Turning on the phone, he went through his gallery and saw the pictures that his friends had sent him. He went online and listened to videos of them laughing and cheering. He felt his heart sink in his chest.  
How could he do this? How could he make this selfish decision and hurt everyone he loved.  
He lost track of time after spiraling again. He looked out the window and saw how dark it was. He also saw his reflection, taunting him again. He hurried out of the room, but was only met with more and more reflections.  
He couldn't get away from himself.  
On the verge of a panic attack, he fled. Leaping out of his house and running away to anywhere he couldn't see himself. The rooftops were a good option, but it sure was cold. He followed his feet to Marinette's house. He entered her room and saw himself again, being constantly stalked by his mistakes. He turned the monitors around and curled up on her bed and pulled the cover over his head. The darkness flooded his vision, making him feel safe. He started to drift away, hoping that by the time he woke up, he'd be out of this nightmare.  
\--  
He woke up, not knowing how long he's been asleep. He hadn't realized how tired he was before sleeping. The sun was shining through the balcony door and he got up. The bed was so warm and familiar that he didn't want to leave. He began to leave her home, but stopped at the railing of the balcony. It was so open out here- so... cold out here. He looked back at Marinette's room, then back at the empty world. He shook his head and turned back into the home. He can be a person again later. For now? He just wanted to feel okay.  
\--  
A couple of weeks have gone by. Chat has eaten all of the food in the bakery and stained the warm sheets with tears. He ruined this place with his sulking. He finally has the courage to leave, jumping onto different roof tops and regretting all of his decisions constantly. He wouldn't have ever been in this situation if he wasn't so stupid. What was he going to do now? A lot of the good food should have been spoiled by now. He has to search for new places to eat. He is a cat, so there can be a chance for him to fish? He looked over the roof top and down into the water. The person he's been avoiding suddenly showed his face again.  
Adrien let out a frustrated scream, ''STOP FOLLOWING ME!!'' He held his head in his hands and began to cry. His emotions have become a roller coaster as of late. Why does he have to be the one to deal with this? Why him? He didn't do anything wrong, it was Chat Blanc who was at fault here. He shut his eyes. That idiot was the one who blew up Paris and killed all it's people. It was so damn annoying that he was shadowed by Chat Blanc, no matter where he went.  
He couldn't get away from him. From his face, to his hands, to his voice, to his thoughts- He was inescapable. Why couldn't Chat Blanc just _disappear_? Why can't he just...  
He opened his eyes and looked down at his hands, which were covered in white. He just sat there, staring at his hands. It was his hands that were white, his powers that were destructive, his fault they all died. He had been trying so hard to sever himself from his mistakes that he forgot who he was. He forgot why he was here. He was slowly losing his connection to being a human being. He hunched over and held his hand to his chest. His cataclysm was charging in his grasp, growing once again. Chat pushed it to his chest, just wanting to end this suffering- end this torment. It all went white once again...  
When Chat opened his eyes, the world around him was a tad bit paler. It seemed as though the edges of the city were fading into whiteness ever so slightly. He sat, defeated. He couldn't do anything right. It seemed as though he really did have to deal with the consequences now. He looked up at the light sky and hummed a tune. A tune about a little kitty,  
\--  
Months have passed and Chat Blanc has finally accepted that he is the problem here. He deserves to suffer like this. He sat atop one of the tallest remaining building and let his legs dangle off of the edge. The world was still beneath his feet.  
_Little kitty on a roof, all alone without his lady..._ While singing, he could swear that his lost love's voice was nearby.  
''Chat Noir.'' an oh so familiar said. He couldn't believe his ears, he turned to see if his mind had finally cracked. His heart skipped a beat when he saw her vibrant red and black form standing against the white-washed world.  
''M'lady?'' He quickly stood on his feet and took steps towards her.  
''I thought I'd lost you!'' He jumped down onto the roof and hurried towards her with outstretched arms.  
''Oh I was _feline_ so sad that you were gone!!'' he watched as his lady stepped back.  
''W-What's happened to you..?'' She shook her head, ''NO! Don't tell me! We're gonna fix everything!''  
Hope finally started to swell in his chest again. His heart was pounding, both at his love being back and at the chance to right his wrongs. He smiled.  
''Of _course_ we're gonna fix everything!'' He crawled around her, making sure that she really was here.  
''Now that you're back and now that you're going to...'' She watched him with a hint of shock and surprise on her face. His outside might've changed but he was still the same ol guy she'd fell in love with.  
''GIVE ME YOU'RE MIRACULOUS!!'' He reached for her earrings, which got a yelp of surprise from his lady. She grabbed his arms and kicked him away, flipping elegantly away from him. He stood, feeling relief at the fact that the stinging of pain still affected someone who was so far gone.  
''My miraculous? What's wrong with you, Chat Noir?'' She stood, battle ready, spinning her yo-yo with an angry look on her face. This sent a spike of disappointment through his body. He stood up, quick to apologize.  
''Sorry... I didn't mean to be rude m'lady...'' he held out his hand, ''Could you please hand me your miraculous, please?'' She continued to stand there, spinning her yo-yo. Why was she being so difficult?  
''Chat Blanc has,'' he turned away, ''gotten into some mischief.'' At that, he heard her stand down.  
''You've been akumatized, Chat Noir.'' She started towards him. His heart began to flutter at her presence. He really does have a shot at being better again.  
''You don't need my miraculous, you need me to de-evilize you.'' She reached out, ''let me help you.'' She wiped a tear from his face, and it took everything in him to not lean into the touch. It's been so long since he's felt someone else. He felt his true self coming out.  
''Save me...'' he sniffled.  
''My poor kitty...'' she put a hand on his shoulder.  
''Tell me,'' she said, while touching various spots on his costume, ''do you remember where the akuma went?'' She continued to search while Chat started to think. She's so close now, maybe he can trick her into handing them over. She might not even remember what happened, so he has to help her remember. He needs her to remember so that she can help.  
He grabbed her hand and put it on his chest, smiling all the while, ''Here! _But it's already_ **_broken_**.'' He reached twice more for her earrings, but she kept avoiding him. She tripped him and crawled away, getting up and running towards the edge. Chat got up in pursuit as he watched her leap off. He jumped off right after her.  
_Why was she being so difficult!!_  
''Now you're breaking more than my heart, Marinette!''  
She turned, surprised, ''What?!'' She tripped while landing on the bus, stumbling onto her hands and knees.  
Chat landed perfectly, since cats always land on their feet, and he coolly walked towards his love.  
''W-What did you say?!'' He got annoyed at her confusion, but he couldn't fault her. It's his fault she forgot after all.  
''Give me a hug,'' he raised a claw with a cataclysm, ''Marinette!!'' He rushed towards her and slashed, missing her retreating body. He loved and hated how quick she was.  
She continued to dodge all of his advances, jumping away from him over and over.  
''You're wrong! I'm not Marinette!'' She leaped from car to car, ''It's impossible! I never told you anything!'' Those words stung. Why didn't she remember their history? Why had he wiped her memory like that? It's just blow after blow for poor ol Chat Blanc.  
She circled back to the bus and turned to him, a look of shock on her face. This made him angry. She's not cooperating _at_ **_ALL!!_**  
''Give me your miraculous so I can make everything go back to the way it was!'' He charged a cataclysm in his hands and shot it towards her.  
''Mega CATACLYSM!!'' She jumped out of the way, but the blast continued on towards the building behind her. It exploded, causing the building to collapse into the water. Ladybug zipped away from him, frantically looking for some other place to land. He followed quickly behind, hunting his prey. She threw her yo-yo and zipped onto the Eiffel Tower, which was now on it's side and halfway submerged into the water. He jumped right behind her.  
He crawled on the still, cold metal, ''Things were purr-fect until Hawkmoth found out about everything. Once the cat is out of the bag,'' he stood up and searched for her, ''it's only a matter of time before everyone knows.'' He still couldn't believe that she had forgotten everything that they've been through. It made him angry just thinking about it.  
How could she forget what he has done?  
''It was our love that did this to the world, m'lady.'' He continued to search. It should be easy to find her, but she's one sneaky bug.  
He leaped onto higher ground, ''I'll find you m'lady! And when I do, you'll give me your _miraculous_!'' His thoughts were interrupted by a sudden tackle from behind. He fell onto a bar of metal with a thud, Ladybug on top of him. She jumps away, almost making him fall off of the tower completely. He hoisted himself up while she broke his staff.  
''Time to de-evi... oh?'' She looked around for the akuma she thought would be flying out by now.  
''Looking for my akuma, m'lady?'' He smiled while charging up another cataclysm. He threw it at her but she leaped away. He stood and threw more blasts towards the areas where she'd land. He knew all of her movements by now, she was his partner after all. She jumped onto the highest part of the tower and stood there. He followed, hand outreached.  
''There's a faster way to make this end, y'know... you just need to hand over yoUR MIRACULOUS!!''  
She turned to him, ''NEVER!''  
She threw up her yo-yo, ''Lucky Charm!'' he watched as an eraser fell into her hands.  
''An eraser?'' how ironic, ''I'd like to erase the past too, but there's only one way to do that.'' He readied another cataclysm.  
''You know that by merging our miraculous together, we'd be granted one wish, right?'' he walked towards her, cataclysm still charged.  
''Any wish we wanted! Well, my wish would be to fix everything, so we could be in love again... and have a hamster too.'' If he just reasoned with her, maybe then can she understand.  
He reached for her, for her earring, ''You've always dreamed of having one! We'll call it-'' hand on her earring, he twisted his arm and maneuvered around his body so that she had him pinned to her mercy. She ripped his belt from his waist and jumped to her feet, ripping it in half.  
''Time to de-evil-'' Nothing came out. Why is she so stubborn? It's like his words were going in one ear and out the other. He finally lost his hope of reasoning with her,  
''You're not even listening.'' He's had enough, ''You don't understand.'' She started to spin her yo-yo again, ready to fight, but he just charged a cataclysm and flicked it towards her feet. It hit the metal and it cracked, leading to her falling towards the water below. He waited for a moment, trying to compose himself, when she zipped back behind him.  
''What did you _do to them?!_ ''  
''I didn't mean to.'' He turned to look at her, why isn't she doing anything to cooperate? ''Why won't you help me fix it.'' Now he was facing her completely, pain and anger swirling in his chest.  
''The simple truth is, you don't love me anymore!'' He raised a hand and charged a massive cataclysm, ''so I might as well destroy you! Me! Our memories!! EVERYTHING!'' His voice cracked along with his heart.  
''NO!'' Ladybug cried while the cataclysm grew more and more. It was like deja vu. It grew and grew, just like the despair and anguish in his chest. He couldn't take it anymore.  
''Okay!'' she ran towards him, ''Okay, I'll give you my miraculous, Chat Noir!'' Her cooperation made him retract the cataclysm. She has finally come to her senses.  
He exhaled, something inside of him awakening once again. ''I'm not Chat Noir anymore... I'm Chat Blanc.'' he hadn't realized but he flicked the bell by his throat. The little jingle played while Ladybug took her first step towards him. She walked up to him and put her hands on his chest, smiling up at him.  
''You will always be Chat Noir to me.'' She leaned in, puckering her lips. This caughtChat completely by surprise. Maybe this means that things can go back to the way it was?  
He watched as she tore the bell from his costume and punched it, releasing the akuma from within.  
''No more evil doing for you little akuma. Time to de-evilize Chat Noir!'' She swung her yo-yo and caught the akuma, releasing it as a beautiful butterfly.  
''Bye-bye little butterfly!'' She waved it off. The poisonous ooze melted off of Chat's body.  
He looked around, feeling lighter. He looked around at what's been done with new eyes. He caught the butterfly in his hands and smiled.  
A voice from behind her spoke, ''Yes, yes! You did it, Minibug!''  
What was going on? He had to get some answers.  
''Marinette? What happened?'' His only answer was a sad sigh from his lady.  
''What's wrong..?'' He felt the anxiety slowly crawling up his chest.  
''You're still calling me Marinette. You're not supposed to know who I am.'' Those words stung, just like what had happened before.  
She continued,''It means, that if I use my Miraculous Ladybug to fix everything now...''  
''You'll still have this memory of her.'' Bunnix finished.  
Chat realized what this meant. It meant that he couldn't go back to how things were. It meant he couldn't be with the Marinette that loved him. He couldn't go back to the good times they had or the sights they saw or the experiences they shared. It would all be wiped away. It also means that he might not even get the chance to live another day. But by the feeling in his gut, it seems as though that's a good thing.  
Suddenly, Ladybug piped up, ''Of course!'' she turned to Chat and ran over to him, giving him a big hug.  
''I'm gonna fix everything, Chat Noir! I promise.'' Her smile alone made him feel safe and secure. He felt warm again.  
He watched her go with a smile on his face, ''I know.''  
She disappeared into the circle of light and he was alone. He only remembers this time but he feels as though he's been through this many times before. He looked around again, looking at how much Paris was in ruin. He looked down at his hands, had he done this? He looked back at the circle and exhaled, relieved.  
His lady was gonna fix everything. No matter his mistakes, he knows that she'll be there for him. After a couple of minutes, he saw little ladybugs glitter and swarmed towards him. He smiled, relief washing over him again. He opened his arms and closed his eyes, facing the sky. The last thing he felt was the love for his lady and the soft kisses of ladybugs.

**Author's Note:**

> Wow! You made it to the end!! I hope you enjoyed the read!!


End file.
